Sunday, January 30, 2011

A Dad’s Perspective on the Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother

Originally posted in BookDads
by TimeOutDad

On the cover, it reads, “This is a story about a mother, two daughters, and two dogs.” Immediately, I thought, "What about the father?" After reading this book, I firmly believe that it’s also about the “Unsung Hymn of the Tiger Mother’s Husband.” One might think Jed Rubenfeld (Tiger Dad) sat around and did nothing, while Tiger Mom ruled and dictated her two daughters’ lives.

I admired how he didn’t take sides. He respected and loved his wife and his daughters. No matter how much he disagreed with her teachings or philosophy, he never made her the “fall guy.” He backed her up, but then disagreed with her when the kids weren’t around. He created balance and harmony for his family. When she ruled with an iron fist, he made up for it by a loving hand. That’s one of the big reasons why I think the family was able to stay strong and together.

One thing that Amy Chua fails to mention her book is the importance of harmony in Chinese culture. Harmony is about balance and unity and diversity. It’s about appreciation and acceptance. Interestingly, in music, the harmony is played behind the melody. It can go unnoticed, if one isn’t paying attention, yet it’s essential.

So, from one Dad to another, here’s to the unsung hero, Jed Rubenfeld!

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