"Well, it's only funny when we say it..."

So I turned 32 last week, and got a homemade birthday card from my SAHM friend who is currently building her eBay empire based on her love of iron-on transfers, Superman, and all things '80s. The front of the card featured this photo of her darling daughter (proudly wearing her product, of course), with the subtitle, "Another birthday?" Inside is the punchline: "Don't sweat it!"

["Don't sweat it!" Get it? Asians? And sweatshops? Get it? And child labor? And she's sitting at the press like she's... Oh, never mind.] Well, that one's never gonna make a Great ExpectAsians card....


Not about to put my friend out there (with her permission, of course) without being willing to embarrass myself, here's a pic from Halloween, when we dressed our babygirl in a kimono and Grandma's wig and called the ensemble "sushi bar hostess." (I had really wanted to pair the wig with a little baby sportcoat and call it "Asian American anchorwoman," but I couldn't find any cheap size-12-months businesswear. Oh well, maybe in a few years. We've still got the wig.)

So, what painfully non-p.c., self-stereotyping inside-jokes—that you'd get pissed off and e-mailing Angry Asian Man about if "somebody else" did it—have you played on your poor, unsuspecting, trusting mini-me's? (C'mon, don't lie, you know you've done it!)